The Before Family Stages

The Before Family Stages

Today I want to discuss the important pieces before creating a family. My blog is orientated around families. How to help them, what traits are bad, and other things beneficial. In this blog I will focus on the before aspect. In doing so hopefully we will avoid the future problems that could potentially pop up. 

Here are some questions to ponder as we go through this discussion. What is dating? Some people have a somewhat misunderstood idea of this. Next, Why do we date? Finally is going on dates and important part to finding an eternal companion?

Our focus is dating if you haven't guessed that already. This is the beginning to finding a companion. Dating is an important term in our society that is not always understood, FULLY. We see many couple couples all around us to claim to be "dating". Are they actually though? Dating specifically is going on dates. Dating someone does not just sit as a title with-in a relationship of two people who just "hangout" all the time. When you are so called "dating" someone then you need to do exactly that, GO ON DATES, and often at that. If this is required for such a title, we can ask why? 

Dates are an important part in developing wholesome, long-lasting, relationships. When we "hang out" with the people that we say that we are "dating", we do not have the true opportunity of getting to know someone. There also is not as much of an opportunity to see the others true colors. Going on dates opens up someones heart creating a deeper connection if that relationship is to be furthered, or no feelings at all, if there is someone else who would be better for us. 

I too want to explain and cover the side of people who claim to be "dating" but truly only hang out. This in a idea of some other opinion can be better for dating but lets look at what this hanging out is. From my experience when I hang out with a girl it often includes the following. Sitting on my phone while she does the same, watching something with very limited talking, and other activities that aren't really proactive. In comparison to my true dates that include things like, dinner, games (not electronically), and other very interactive activities. When we look at the activities that are taking place. One side is communicative while the other is much less. Even just eating a sit down dinner versus eating snack, the communication that happens is so different. At dinner you are there in the moment and you have to talk. Snack eating just creates very temporal conversations that are not worth great value. 

I have had relationships that involved no dating and they were miserable. There was a sense of attachment developed for these people but love was lacking. I have too, had the opportunity to truly date someone. In that relationship was greater joy, I knew who I was interested in personally, and I wanted forever with them because I actually knew them. And even in that relationships there were times when going on dates wouldn't happen. That was a negative experience for both of us. When we had these "droughts" we were not as happy. We would bicker more, argue more, and sometimes even be disrespectful to one another. I have a testimony that dating is important. 

With my information I think we can also apply this to married couples. You can never fully know someone. So why not take this dating idea into marriages. Go on dates for a healthy relationship. Healthy relationships are much more likely to succeed. Take this as you may but without dating in your relationship I don't feel that you can say that you truly in a relationship status.